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Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Reality 10: That love of mine once...

I hate that feeling, really.

I can’t stop thinking of you, deym!!! Hearing back the song once again, it melted me. i just don’t know if sinasadya ng panahon na marinig ko yong kantang yon! Hammmp! Kaya ayoko sumakay ng taxi as much as possible dahil malamig ang mga kanta, walang rock bakit bah! Naman! Kapag sa jeep naman ako, all I have is my dreams, all I could think of is the life I want after I pass the board exam. Mga pangarap na minsan alam kong impossible pero gusto kong abotin at nakakalimutan kita sa pagkakataong yan.

Not to deny it, everyday kahit a second, oo I still thought of you. I am different with my feelings sa’yo dahil siguro naging ako nong tayo, I am not the person na ako ngayon yong madaming gusto sa buhay, madaming pangarap dahil when I was with you, simply lang ang lahat. Alam  ng diyos how I tried to forget you, not to love you anymore, not to miss you even more. So many times now I wanted to see you back again to know hanggang saan ba kaya ng puso ko tumayo na mag-isa pero hindi ko kaya. I am okay na ganito, wala akong narinig, wala akong alam, parang ok na ako na ang alam ko puro magandang alaala ang natira sakin. I tried not to cry this thing out again pero my geeedd!! I can’t help it, my heart is going to explode.

Confused na naman ako dahil alam kong pinandigan ko ang decision ko, pero malapit na rin mag-isang taon at ganito pa rin ang nararamdaman ko, OO handa na akong magmahal ulit, magcommit, magpakatanga once again lol pero paano nga ba kung may natitirang ganitong feeling pa? puchek! I had the best years with you and I am afraid hindi kayanin ng darating na malagpasan ang ano man ang meron between us. laging sinasabi ng lahat na mas higit pa ang darating sa nawala sayo. Ang nasa utak ko “talaga? Paano nga ba?”

I hate the feeling when I remember you, when I miss you…

I am not hoping anymore, I am not thinking anymore of being together once again, I just maybe need to live my life the way it is now, I maybe live some of those memories but we can’t turn back everything. This is my now and I have to live with that.

hooo! maygeewwdd!! i wanted to cry out loud again!!!! =(

at

30 comments:

  1. Arvin U. de la PeñaJanuary 29, 2013 at 11:20 AM

    hmmmmmmm..ano kayang kanta iyon..

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    Replies
    1. LalaJanuary 29, 2013 at 1:30 PM

      hehehehe as much as i dont want to hear it, nananadya haha

      Delete
  2. June | Life and SpicesJanuary 29, 2013 at 1:20 PM

    Lala.. kumain ka kaya ng chocolate just an advice.. Sana it'll help.

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    Replies
    1. LalaJanuary 29, 2013 at 1:31 PM

      try ko nga later yong sundae sa jabeh maya hehehe nagbefore 6 na ako ngayon. hehehe naiinis ako pag ganito ang feeling ko kasi tataba na naman ako hahaha

      Delete
    2. OlivrJanuary 29, 2013 at 11:28 PM

      agree. chocolates has serotonin, which is a compound for happiness..

      Delete
  3. fiel-kunJanuary 29, 2013 at 1:24 PM

    Lala! talagang tinamaan ka dun sa previous relationship mo ah.

    Ang mahalaga ngayon ay ang kasalukuyan. Walang nakaraan o hinaharap. Very misleading kasi ang time eh. Yung mga mga naranasan mo sa nakaraan ay magsilbing lessons na lamang sayo sa kasalukuyan para harapin ang bagong bukas. Naks!

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    Replies
    1. LalaJanuary 29, 2013 at 1:34 PM

      hahaha oo pero matagal na yon kaso hala nga ito naaalala pa once or twice hahaha

      kaya nga naging happy ang life dahil naging busy ang life ko rin sa social networks, nakilala ko ang mga supper blogger friends na may makukulitan ako echos! hehehe pero seriously there are moments talaga na yong ikaw lang magisa at ang dami mong maisip haha naman naman!! kaya ito!!! woooo!!!

      Delete
  4. littleyanaJanuary 29, 2013 at 1:32 PM

    I like how you described your feelings. Totally relatable. Kasi ganito rin ako dati pero tama sila. Time heals all wounds. Walang standard whether one year or longer, basta darating yung time wala ng effect sayo kahit memories niya. I hope you'll get over the feelings soon..

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    1. LalaJanuary 29, 2013 at 2:17 PM

      yeah nakaya ko noon yan pero iba ito ngayon grabi nakakaloka teh!! hahaha kinakaya ko sana i can get through this kasi nahihirapan na ako at ngayon lang ako may reklamong dramang ganyan haha

      Delete
    2. Senyor IskwaterJanuary 29, 2013 at 4:08 PM

      haaaaayyyyy...sana nextx post humor naman...rest ka naman sa emo moments....lol..ganito pala feeling ng sub admin...

      Delete
    3. LalaJanuary 29, 2013 at 6:41 PM

      hahaha sarap maging admin haha parang nasa sariling blog ka lang lol

      oo nga kailangan ko na talaga ng pahinga sa pagiging emo ang pagiging humor naman ay hindi sa pagdedeliver ng salita ang talent ko but slight nga lang sa physical humor lol good thing with u kasi asset mo na talaga ang pagiging humorous hahaha

      Delete
  5. MARIAJanuary 29, 2013 at 1:46 PM

    awww relate much! minsan ganun talaga we let ourselves believe na nakamove on na tyo but deep inside may residue of the past na para bang mantsa na sa ating mga puso at hindi na maaalis pa hehe..

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    1. LalaJanuary 29, 2013 at 2:15 PM

      hindi nakukuha ng ariel ang mantsa sa puso ko hahaha nakakainis!! ngayon lang naman tong feeling nato dahil sa taxi na yon hahaha in time pero ang hirap grabeh nakakalokah na! haha

      Delete
    2. Senyor IskwaterJanuary 29, 2013 at 4:07 PM

      malalampasan mo nga rin yan...give youself like 10 years...ganyan...

      Delete
  6. Senyor IskwaterJanuary 29, 2013 at 2:08 PM

    weh? d ka na talaga umaasa? hindi tayo sure jan... ano breakfast mo? ampalaya? wow ha... damang-dama ko ang pait... magbalikan na lang kayo... GO!

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    1. LalaJanuary 29, 2013 at 2:13 PM

      haha hindi na talaga teh!! hindi na nga kasi puhwedi!! hahaha alam mo naman yon ata!! hikhikhik wala na akong babalikan haha

      Delete
    2. Senyor IskwaterJanuary 29, 2013 at 3:53 PM

      harassin mo...ganyan...pilitin mo!

      Delete
  7. GenskieJanuary 29, 2013 at 2:30 PM

    Kaya ko ayoko nakikinig ng mga love songs eh... it always leads your thought into something... hindi na ako mag tataka kung bakit ang iba pag katapos makinig ng malungkot na kanta... nag papaka matay... super powerful talaga ng song ano.. it can stir up the hidden emotion even the demons in you... hahaha..
    kaya mo yan...
    Kung yung iba nga nakaya you can too...
    Sana maging okay ka na soon. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LalaJanuary 30, 2013 at 10:12 PM

      exactly sis, hindi ko alam anong meron sa kanta at nadadala tayo haha the tune? the sound? the melody? letchhss!! hahaha kaya nga ayoko talaga sumakay ng taxi kung pede lang kasi so far walang rock na kanta halos love song sabay pa ang malamig na aircon at makulimlim na kalingatan hahaha nanadya talaga ang panahon!!

      Delete
  8. joyJanuary 29, 2013 at 3:06 PM

    Maybe it helps to focus to the future one and not to think of him. Bat mo pahirapan sarili mo? Try to see the positive things in life:)
    I wish you all the best in life. You deserve it:)

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    Replies
    1. AnthonyJanuary 29, 2013 at 4:48 PM

      Choice na nang tao kung pahihirapan pa nila ang mga sarili nila sa nakaraan or igawad na ang kalayaan mula dito. Iinom na lang natin iyan pagdating ni Archie dito. :)))

      Delete
  9. PhioxeeJanuary 29, 2013 at 5:37 PM

    ;-) ganyan talaga pag mahal mo masyado si Ex. para lang syang shadow, lala. trust me di yan mawawala. tapos magiging standard mo pa sya sa makikilala mo. ang lupet ng puso. bt anyway, you're strong. at diba di mo na iniisip na maging kau.youll get used to it. bt at least 2 years pa siguro. ;-)

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    1. LalaJanuary 30, 2013 at 9:18 PM

      kaya nga mahirap, wala naman akong hinahanap as in like an ideal one pero plus factor talaga ang matalino hahaha may standard din lol iba kasi kapag parang magkaibigan lang kayo noh? sa gabi lang kayo magbf-gf char!!! hahaha basta sana nga kayanin at mapanindigan ko ito!!

      Delete
  10. MEcoyJanuary 29, 2013 at 8:07 PM

    hala hirap nyan lala,
    naexperience ko na yan ng dahil sa kanta dameng memories na bumabalik
    parang my kurot na dala talaga ang mga kantang yan
    nanadya pa nga haha
    kaya mahirap mag dedicate ng song sa isang taong di mo
    siguradong magtatagal

    ReplyDelete
  11. gordJanuary 29, 2013 at 10:12 PM

    Yes, you can't turn back everything. And you won't be forgetting everything.

    The only way is moving on, moving forward. :)

    ReplyDelete
  12. OlivrJanuary 29, 2013 at 11:29 PM

    You still win the game, because you were true, and you accept the reality. next time you'll be happier.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Juicy JayJanuary 30, 2013 at 2:26 PM

    Move on na with a bag of chocolates hehehe. Chocolates can make you happy sabi nga nila hehehe

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  14. ArchievinerJanuary 30, 2013 at 4:01 PM

    Pressure kaba sa Feb 14??? Chillax lang. Ang saya ng buhay. Maging positibo nalang tayo. Isipin mo nalang di ka nag-iisa. Marami tayo. Normal lang yang nararamdaman mo kasi nagmamahal ka :P Tagay!

    ReplyDelete
  15. JH AlmsFebruary 1, 2013 at 8:17 AM

    tsk.. same same.. channel na lang siguro yung pakiramdam na yun para maging inspirado sa ibang bagay.. :)

    ReplyDelete
  16. joanneFebruary 2, 2013 at 6:39 AM

    Mukhang nadadala ka ng emo dahil malapit na Vday ah! Haha, chos lang! Alam mo, ako din, na-aassociate ko yung mga songs sa mga tao. Hindi lang sa ex ko, pero may mga songs na pag narinig ko automatic na may maalala akong someone. Mahirap talaga mag-move on e but you'll ge there. Again, in God's perfect time. So wag magmadali, at wag papasok sa bagong relasyon kung di ka pa fully recovered from the old one. I agree with Daddy Jay, i-chocolates mo na lang yan, lol

    ReplyDelete